[Seabird]

Thanks, Fiona.

I don’t know what I want to do or where I want to go – that’s the problem. As far as I can tell, I don’t want anything.

I’ve sat on responding for a while because I really wanted to give things a fair shot of settling down and making sure my emotions weren’t clouding my judgement or “insight”.

The end of the relationship wasn’t upsetting because I lost him – it was upsetting because I lost myself.

For better or worse, it can not be denied that I have become a very different person.

I think in some ways I have been reborn – in the sense that everything is new and strange. I genuinely don’t understand what it is it to want to go somewhere, for example.

In fact…the entire concept of wanting anything seems very foreign and alien to me.

I guess it would help to get some insight into what his significance was in my life – what role he was supposed to play, what path he was supposed bring me to, what lesson I was supposed to learn.

I would appreciate any insight anyone may have to offer on that point – I feel it may give me a hint as to what direction to move forward.

[Author]

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