Relationship question


Main LifeLeap Café Free Psychic Questions Relationship question

This topic contains 146 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  christopherj 6 years, 9 months ago.

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  • #7205

    KathyN
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    Hey Christopher,
    The name “Wilson” might be part of an address or location. You should continue to follow your dreams, and you have good intuition about what would work for you. You knew that you shouldn’t take the word of someone who said he could get you a job. You knew that it wouldn’t be definite until a job was offered to you. Also that you need to stay where you are close to good public transportation.

    It is difficult to work at a job that you aren’t passionate about, but unfortunately that is what many people have to do. You are seeing this as a step in a larger plan and it is important to try to do your very best at what you do, even if you don’t want to do it for the long haul. You will find that you have pride in yourself and in your work. There should be companies who provide on the job training. I am thinking about banks, either in local branches or administrative offices. Your years of college should give you an edge over others who possibly are not college educated. Also consulting with an employment counselor might be of help. You need a job that will provide you with a steady income so that you can pay off your loans. Then you will feel that you can pursue additional training, and during that time continue with your “day job”.

    Just keep entering the contests– many entertainers have struggled for years to get the recognition needed to further their careers. The entertainment industry is a tough business. Unfortunately, you may encounter some ruthless individuals who will stop at nothing to get what they want. I wonder how the powers that be go about filtering out all the contestants for the TV competitions? I enjoy following the competitions. Even those who do not advance to the finals will receive attention from people who might want to help them along with other endeavors.

    So if you can just set up a long range plan that is set in parts — the first step being securing a “day job” that will provide you with an income– you should have a clearer focus on what you should do next.

    Please keep in touch to let us know how things are going for you–

    Take care!
    🙂

    #7206

    christopherj
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    Hi Kathy,
    Just wanted to let you know what i’ve been up to. Started really getting into songwriting, I don’t know if it’s because of the mindset that I’ve been in or what, but I’ve got six songs that i’m working on the lyrics for so I’m happy about that. Lately, not much had been going on with me in terms of my music career, so i’m happy I’m finally getting something going. Also, one of my friends i’ve known since high school, we started talking on facebook and she shared with me how passionate and interested she was about me, just about as much as me, which got me excited since I’ve wanted to find someone like that for a long time. I hoping that I will be able to collaborate with her and work with her, maybe even form a group with her, which would be a dream come true. She is a fantastic songwriter, plays guitar, and from what she said, a fantastic voice which I can’t wait to hear. The only thing is that she is trying to break out of her shyness and gain more confidence in performing in front of people, which i can relate to since i was where she is right now. Needless to say, she is honestly the type of person I’ve been looking, as an artist and as a person, I would be lying if I said I was really attracted to her. Her name is Angela(2/27/87) and I think that the smart thing to do would just to continue to talk to her and just see where this goes. The last thing I want to do is ruin the great friendship that we have right now. I do wonder though if she feels anything for me, I think she does, but I just don’t know. I would obviously be overjoyed if we could potentially go out sometime, she said she’d like to come out to hang sometime and work on music. But, anyways, I was wondering if you could share any insight into this, if there is any hope for me potentially having a relationship with her. Thank you for your continued help.

    #7207

    KathyN
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    Hey Christopher,
    It is really great that you are getting into songwriting. Also that you reconnected with Angela. Sharing a love of music and having the desire to perform is a great way to become better acquainted. You definitely are taking the right approach by continuing to talk to her on Facebook and plan to get together to share your music. Sometimes singing partners become closer as a result of their association and performing together. It is important to just take the time to see where this leads. You can hang out and spend time together, even ask her to dinner. It doesn’t have to be classified as a date, just a friendly association while you get to know each other.

    On another subject– I have a strong sense that you could possibly land a day job working for a bank. It could be in an area that is within walking distance from your current residence. It might possibly be an entry level position and might not initially be a full time job— but perhaps more than half time. So you might want to be on the lookout for an opportunity like this.

    Take care– and please let me know your thoughts about this–
    🙂

    #7208

    christopherj
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    Hi Kathy,
    With regards to the angela thing, we haven’t talked for a while now, so i don’t know really what is going on. I know that she has a lot that she’s dealing emotionally, looking for work, trying to get herself together, she’s kind of fallen off the grid, so i don’t know when we will be talking again. I just hope that I didn’t do or say anything to make it seem that was coming on too strong, since i am attracted to her but wanted to keep things on a friendship level. I’ve lost many friends because of the fact that I was too forward, expressed my feelings and made things awkward for them that they didn’t want to be friends with me anymore. Anyways, only time will tell I guess, hope everything turns out alright. I get the feeling though that I am only one that’s interested in wanting a relationship, at least that’s what my track record has been, it’s always been very one sided with me showing interest and the other person wanting only friendship, nothing else.

    I wouldn’t be opposed to taking a job at a bank, I would settle for almost anything right now that could earn me some money. Speaking of, i’m still trying to get through this at home computer course, that i hope will land me a job, I just don’t know when since there is so much material to get through, it starts to feel a little overwhelming. But, I know that i’ve got through about almost a third of it so there is hope that i will and can make it, I just have to keep at it. It’s tiring though with so much info to get through, I wish there was a faster way. I know I don’t want to quit since I told myself I would do this, also, my best friend want me to move out to Vegas after I get this certification to work in an IT job, if I quit, he would never let me hear the end of it.

    Besides that, I’ve been feeling stuck figuring out what I want to do my life, what i want to do with my music. I feel that my music has been on the back burner since i’ve been trying to focus on finding a job and not really doing a lot for my music career, which is supposed to be my passion. My mom told me to put more time on doing something with my music which I started to do more today, but I don’t know where it’s going, if anywhere. I really hope this work out, I bought a program to help with my piano playing, which I hope will transfer into all aspects of my musicianship, songwriting, playing/performing, arranging, turn me into a better musician. I’m at that point where i really want something to happen, get my life heading a direction, a new direction, but I don’t know how to get there, when will i get there, or if I will get there? I guess I though I knew what I wanted (to be a performer, have my own group, be a recording artist, music producer), but I don’t know right now. It’s just frustrating, I’m trying to do all things, but nothing really seems like it’s going anywhere, or not moving fast enough. I do still have my church job, still involved in the opera company at home, the cal phil choir thing, and I started back with my voice lessons, all are good things, I just wish I knew what was coming after all this, how all this would be helping my future.

    On top of this, I talked to my dad yesterday for the first time in four years, since he moved away after my parents got divorced, though they’ve been divorced for a long time now. It was the toughest phone conversation I’ve ever had, I was ready to cry my eyes out as soon as I heard his voice. I was happy to hear his voice since, I’ve thought about him a lot, wondering how he was doing, hoping he was okay. He seemed to be doing fine, had his own place, trying to look for work. I told him how i was doing, wished him a happy father’s day and, he said he would start sending me some money to help me out since he knew that I was struggling trying to find more work. Anyways, these last couple days have been pretty rough, I could really use some insight into where things may be going from here. I could really use another vacation, maybe some soul searching, a time to turn a new chapter in my life, some winds of change would be good right now.

    #7209

    KathyN
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    Hey Christopher,

    You have done nothing wrong in regard to the situation with Angela. I sense that she is feeling that she must first get a day job before she can focus further on her music. You could possibly be hearing from her after this happens.

    It is hard for you right now because your heart is in working with music, but you also realize that you need to have a job in order to be able to pay your bills and to save money in order to further invest in your career. This is a tough industry and you actually need an agent to promote you in order to get started.

    As for the IT industry, you already realize that it isn’t something that you want to to for the long term, but you are looking at this opportunity realistically. There might be a lot of competition out there. Even recent graduates with degrees in computer science are having difficulty securing jobs. As for your friend wanting you to move to Las Vegas– does he have a guarantee of a job? That is a rapidly growing area and it might be difficult to find a job there. There are more people moving into the city than there are jobs available. So I do believe that you will think about this seriously because you might not feel that you are ready to give up all of your local connections right away?

    I know you realize that sometimes it is a matter of timing when things happen. Right now you are feeling pulled in too many different directions. It seems that you have missed some opportunities to apply for jobs that might have worked for you as a start. If you get started working at a regular job this will increase your self confidence. Don’t give up on your dreams, but you will feel much better once you have a dependable income. So just keep checking for those job opportunities. Many companies post their openings online now. Don’t be afraid to apply for positions that you feel you qualify or could qualify for. Many companies provide on the job training.

    It is really great that you have reconnected with your dad. Now you feel that you can continue to communicate with him.

    As for a vacation, just remember that all that costs money. In fact it costs money just about everytime we walk out of the house. So I think you will feel better if you only do the things that you feel you can afford to pay for.

    Please keep in touch and let us know how you are feeling about these things. It might be good to start with what you feel is the most important thing that you need to take care of right now. Then devote all of your energy to that one task. Once you have that taken care of you could move on to the next important thing, etc.

    Take care!
    🙂

    #7210

    christopherj
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    Hi Kathy,
    How are you doing? I have decided to focus on the most important things right now, securing a full-time job so I can start making money, getting my music career going. Once I start having a steady income, then I can look at getting my own place and become that independent, self-sufficient, responsible man that I want to be. I think after I have all of that, I will be in a better position to looking at finding a girl to start a relationship with.

    Besides that, I was wondering if you had any thoughts or insights into what you think of me as a person. I know that futures aren’t set in stone, but I do find myself thinking where I will go from here, thinking about being the best person I can be. Thank you for all your continued help, I really appreciate it.

    #7211

    KathyN
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    Hey Christopher,
    It is really good to hear from you. What you are setting you mind to do right now will actually be the best for right now. Once you secure that full time job you can then think about expanding your planning for future goals, etc. I sense that you will need to work at something more mundane for a short period of time in order to make that happen. I still see that possibility for you to get a job in the banking industry. It could be locally, or perhaps in a larger city where you could commute daily via public transportation.

    I see you as a very kind, caring person. You value your friends and often put the needs of others ahead of your own. You love your family. You would never hurt anyone intentionally for anything in this world. You have strong spiritual beliefs. You are genuinely a very nice person!

    Please keep in touch!

    Take care!
    🙂

    #7212

    christopherj
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    Hi Kathy,
    How are you doing? I just wanted to let you know what had been going on with me. I started working for a caroling company called charles dickens carolers for a couple weeks now, as in an independent contractor, only from november 11th till the end of december 31st, but I’m really hoping to be able to make as much money as I can with those two months, and hopefully make connections with could lead to great networking opportunities for me. It’s really my first real big thing music wise that could really help me financially. Besides that, I’ve been going to my church job, trying to look for more work, looking for auditions for paid music work, other non-music related work, haven’t found anything else yet. I had a friend, who works at a record company, give me some career counseling, she mentioned some ideas like going back to school for my masters, applying at temp agencies, of which she sent my resume in to a temp agency that she knows to try and get my hired. All in all, some of it I had heard before, it was somewhat helpful, but at the same time, I just felt like I had so many more suggestions in my head that I didn’t know what to do, how to sort through it all. At the end of the day, no matter what ideas or suggestions I might get from other people, it would ultimately be up to me to decide what I’d like to do for myself. I’ve had friends suggest that they would like me to move to various places, back to fullerton, move out to seattle, or san francisco, all of which sound like great choices, but then I would have to decide if it would be worth, if I’d be happy out there, if I be able to find enough good music opportunities out there for me.

    Lately, I’ve been thinking of wanting to move out the Minneapolis, mainly because of a professional male vocal ensemble that are one of the best, and pay well. Also, I’ve been reading about the area out there, and it’s really nice, great opportunities for me, it would definitely give me the change I’ve wanted, to move out into a new area, live on my own, start a new chapter in my life. I don’t know when it would happen, or if it would happen, but it’s been on my mind for a while. I have also been thinking about wanting to help my mom out since we are struggling financially and she is really trying to find ways to make more money, it’s been slow going though. I wrote into the ellen show twice since I know that she always helps people in need, but I haven’t heard anything. I was just hoping that it’d be a great way to help my mom and I if ellen were to respond to my msg. Thank god my sister has been giving what she can to help my mom, I just wish there was something I could do to support her with everything she’s done and does for me. This caroling job could be a start towards reaching my big break and really start making my career come true, I just hope and pray everything will work out for all of us.

    I’ve been going to the panda express in the south pasadena area after my voice lesson for a while now, and I’ve gotten various fortune cookies, some of which said, “this is a properous time of life for you,” “the world will soon be ready to receive your talents,” “next summer you will dance to a different beat,” “you will take over a large sum of money,” ” you have a captivating style all your own.” Now, I don’t know if these could really mean something or not, they could all just be nice sayings, but a part of me would like to think that some of these could be true, maybe. I’ve been thinking a lot, wondering when things would start moving in the right direction, I think the caroling job is a step in a right direction, a slow start, but a step. I have auditions coming up at the end and start of next year, one for the la opera chorus, the other for la master chorale, both big time professional jobs, if I were to land one of them or both, it would be amazing. If I don’t, then I would decide what to do but probably march or so of next year. I just know that I am ready for things to pick up for all of us, I feel like it’s been a long time coming. Any insight you might be able to provide would be very helpful, thank you so much for all your help and support, I always appreciate it.
    -Christopher

    #7213

    KathyN
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    Hey Christopher,
    It is really good to hear from you. You certainly have made some good contacts in the music industry. I know you will keep trying. Actually you are probably living close to a very good area for these contacts. Before you actually move to another area there are so many things to consider. First– the cost of living. You shouldn’t move anywhere without the guarantee of a job. In some cities you might not be able to rent an apartment without proof of income. Also, what kind of weather would you experience in a new location? Being used to mild temperatures, a cold climate could be somewhat of a shock. Also the transportation factor would be important. If you need to depend on public transportation– how reliable would it be?

    If you are able to land a job with a professional chorus that would be wonderful! However, you might need to do something a little more mundane for a while as well. This is what so many entertainers have to do until they get their big break.

    Fortune cookies can be fun– but we really can’t read too much into them. It is nice when they give us hope though. I see you really trying and things are bound to start turning around for you. Please keep in touch!

    Best wishes,
    🙂

    #7214

    christopherj
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    Hi,
    Thank you for replying to my last post. Since then, I finished rehearsals with the caroling company and waiting to get the schedule of events so I can start signing up for gigs and start working and earning money, I’m really looking forward to it, I can’t wait!! I only wish that the caroling company job lasted longer then just november through december. Besides that, I started getting to know this I met through the online dating site, ok cupid. Well, the funny thing is she had sent me a msg towards the end of september, but I was not aware of it till the start of october, I had turned of the notifications since I was never getting much out of it, so I never knew I got a message till later. But, I felt the need to check, I don’t really know why, I like to think that everything happens for a reason and the lord works in mysterious ways. I am glad I did check, cause after that, we started to msg each other, exchange numbers, start texting and we’ve been hanging out for a little while now, it’s been great. The main thing is I’ve been really trying to take it slow and not rush into anything, especially since this is my first time in the dating world. I have been feeling though like I’ve her, Julie (7/8/1985) for a lot longer than just a couple weeks, and she felt the same way too. I’ve just like their was something special about her, not be cheesy or cliche or anything, it’s the truth. On our first date, she came by to pick me up, but I accidentally fell asleep cause I was just tired from the whole day, I woke up an hr later than I should’ve and saw she sent me tons of text msgs and four voicemails, wondering what was going on, thinking I stood her up. I felt terrible and called right then, she was still waiting for me. I was surprised that someone who I had still barely met, would wait a whole hr for me when she could’ve easily driven off. But, I was so grateful, thankful that she would wait for me and give me the chance to make for such a terrible start. We had a great time that night, then we saw each other the next day and had another great day. We text just about every day, which is another first, since I usually don’t text someone that much, that consistently. I actually started a thing where I’d text her good morning each day and good night, which has seemed like a cool little thing. Anyways, we hang out probably at least once a week, maybe more, when we can, she seems to like me and have fun, I really enjoy hanging and talking with her, I was shy at first but I’ve been opening up. I obviously want things to work out between and for us to even become a serious couple, but I don’t want to to jump the gun and push her away. She did tell me she’s been seeing other guys along with me, which is weird to know that, since I’ve been in a situation like this before, especially for my first time dating. I would want her to choose me over those those other guys and I’ve been trying my best to be someone she’d want to be with, even in all my inexperience. All I can do is my best and hope and pray it’s enough for her. Slow steady, trying to go slow and steady. I do feel something for her, for sure. Any insight you might have would be greatly appreciated, thank you! 🙂

    #7215

    KathyN
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    Hey Christopher,

    So glad things seem to be progressing well with your new friend. It sounds like she was looking into the online dating because she wanted the opportunity to meet someone. This is also what you were doing. It seems she is really interested in being with you and keeping the lines of communication open. Just can’t believe that you fell asleep before your first date though! The fact that she waited for you shows that she wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt. You are being wise to take things slow.

    I just sense that it might not be true that she is also seeing other guys right now. This might be a bit of a game twist to make you believe that she has other options? She might be afraid of making a commitment too soon. Most people aren’t comfortable dating someone who is also seeing other people. When you meet that special someone you want that person to be your one and only. This is only natural.

    I have a feeling that things will start to unfold. Around the first of the year you should have a better feel as to where this relationship might be leading. In the meantime, there is a possibility that your work in the caroling company could lead to something along the line of chorus work where you might be traveling a good percentage of the time.

    So just hang in there and keep doing the best that you can. It is always good to hear from you!

    Take care,
    🙂

    #7216

    christopherj
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    Thank you for the reply, it’s nice that she and her can joke the falling asleep thing now haha, but I definitely don’t plan to do that again.

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