First, congratulations! There is a beautiful side to this. Embrace it! Next, I can’t guarantee it, but I’m getting that john will come around once the baby is in the picture. I’m sensing this will hit him like a punch in the nose, in a a good way. Who is now and who is then will be different, and this also applies to your relationship. I’m getting to give it some time before you make any ultimate decisions. The 13 year old will be fine, and should be a great help.