Matters of the heart

[DeLuz]

Hello,

I need some help from a source outside of myself. I have been with my love for almost two years, feels longer. We have been fighting a lot due to my moods and our lack of money because only one of us is employed and we are living together. He is older than me and he has opened my eyes to a lot, I don't think he knows how much I appreciate him because my moods and depression can get the best of me at times. Slowly working on myself. We have been fighting more often now, I know he is going through a hard time himself. It's hard to tell in my perspective if we have completely grown apart or if we can still work on our relationship. Would he be happier if we went separate ways?

I hope that wasn't to vague and someone can shed some light where my eyes can't see

[Frank_In]

DeLuz - My psychic sense is that there is still a deep bond between the two of you, despite all of the anger and other stuff that is on the surface. If you throw it all away now, it feels like it would be a bit of waste to me. I'm not here to be your authority, but I would consider these insights. To me, the fighting feels like a symptom of a greater issue, with the issue being finances and how stress is approached in the relationship. Instead of treating the symptom, it feels like if you work at it, there is a good chance you can fix the cause = finances, and communication issues. I see excuses being made about that second job. Now instead of blaming and continuing to fight over it, if both of you put your mind onto ideas and solutions 100%, the next step could be figured out. The reason I say this is because my psychic sense is that now, it's more about blaming, pointing fingers, and other unproductive behaviors. If there isn't a job available, one may have to be created in the form of a small business, which doesn't feel too far fetched to me. Regardless, it feels like immediate action needs to be taken. Also, when a fight is about to start, you have a choice to do something different. Refuse to fight. Take a walk, give a hug, or do something else. The fighting isn't accomplishing anything. Let me know what you think about this and let me know what else you would like me to specifically focus on.

[DeLuz]

That is really uplifting. I do feel a very strong bond and purpose in our relationship, I was questioning if he still felt any bond at all because of the fighting. I will take all of this into consideration and practice as well because it touches truth of whats going on. I know its going to be work for us both. The main concern/excuse about another job is pay rates and corporations that no one likes, especially settling for less after you have gone to school for something that isn't a good money making field. I don't think there is anything else I could ask, Thank you so so much for your response and time.

[DeLuz]

Actually I do have one thing more that you could focus in on if possible. You mentioned that a small business would be a good idea and I agree, well we both do. Is there any areas that you sense would be good to work with? We both went to school for massage therapy but the field is not so abundant for men. Any advice/ ideas would really help. Since reading your first response and the talks that we have had I feel a little more confident in taking it one day at a time in nurturing our relationship back to health. Thank you

[Frank_In]

I'm happy that I was able to give some positive insight into your relationship. Again, at this time, for you to blow it, feels like a waste to me. Walking away from love because of money is such a sad thing when people allow this to happen, as they so often unnecessarily do. It's not always the solution, but in this scenario, focusing on fixing the issues feels better than throwing in the towel.

As far as the business, the key point I got a pull towards was doing something that both of you feel is having an impact. Just shuffling papers or selling arts and crafts at the flea market isn't enough - despite the income that can be made. There are many businesses that can be started that can generate income, even in this economy. But my psychic sense is that the two of you have to be doing something with meaning behind it, otherwise there could be boredom, depression, lack of passion, etc, which all can end up leading to self-sabotage in your case. Some people just aren't cut out to live a mundane existence. The best way to have a successful thriving business is to go into something that you are passionate about and something that has a realistic income potential.

As far as impact, I'm referring to something where you are doing something to make a difference, to help people. My sense if that both of you have a fire about this. I'm getting mixed message about what exactly it may be, but I'm getting a pull towards something environmental related, but something where you are also doing something to help others. Essentially, something where you are waking up and helping mass numbers of people while at the same time, getting paid for it. My suggestion would be to do research. Get on the net and start talking to people. Find out where there is a need, where the income is, and what you can do with the skills you already have. Of course there are risks involved in taking this direction, but I feel strongly that the benefits, financially and heart wise, will outweigh the risks long-term. The productive step I'm seeing now is hanging in there, doing the digging to find out what the next step will be, being patient, and keeping your head up. My sense is that the direction to take will show itself with a little bit of work. Let me know your thoughts on what I have discussed.

[Dale Sellers]

Frank_In: Thank you for your insights.

DeLuz: I also wanted to point you towards and article which you should find helpful for what you are going through: Find Your Life Purpose

[DeLuz]

Have these things in my mind and my heart everyday, it is so difficult but everyday is another chance to work towards our goals. Thank you